Speculation: GPhone search

Most of us know that Google and Verizon are about to make a deal to run Google software on cellphones (GPhones).
So here is my speculation on how Verizon cell phone may work with Google’s Android software to retrieve contacts:)



Please note, this is just a Photoshop speculation, nothing to do with the real Android performance.
Disclaimer: Google, Android, Verizon logos and trademarks belong to their respective owners.

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No, no, no, you got the target generation wrong!

I was looking for a multiple-headset phone for my new apartment – so, naturally, I went to Fry’s, and while browsing for their selection of the said phones, I came across this wonderful device:

instant messaging via landline!

Behold: instant messaging via landline!

This is the Vtech IS6110 phone, which looks like a smart (cell) phone, but it isn’t. It is a landline phone with – get this – instant messaging capability. Apparently you can connect it to a PC with a USB cable and engage in instant messaging via AOL or MSN.

Instant messaging is available on, like, 99% of modern cell phones and more and more people even disconnect the landline completely. It is worth noting that the group of people who use instant messaging and the group of 100% cell phone people belong to the very same larger group, mostly: the younger people. So this is a catch-22 kind of deal: the more likely someone is to use instant messaging, the less likely that person is to use a landline phone. Besides, if I have to connect it to a computer, why not just use the computer. My laptop is just a little bit bigger than this phone, but much more convenient for… for pretty much everything!

I suppose this is a nice phone and all, but it is some 15 years too late.

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(image from the engadget article)

Greasy phone screens.

Different technologies, same problem.

Different technologies, same problem.

Either there’s a conspiracy or I am doing something wrong. Here’s a picture of two phones I have, one is for the landline (yes! I still use it :p), another is the cell. Both have screens and both have to be held with the screen facing the ear when talking. And I may be a dirty hippy and all, but I have to clean the screens regularly because the skin on my ear is, well, naturally oily.

I believe this is a design failure more than anything else. If the flip phones pretty much have to have this layout, the type of phones pictured above could easily have screen and keyboard on one side, speaker and microphone on the other side. Granted, the screen would get dirty off the hands, but I do wash hands more regularly than ears!

And really, if there is some unknown-to-me rationale to have the screen and the speaker on one side of the phone, why not have two speakers and two microphones, on both sides. The wonders of modern digital signal processing would easily allow switching off the speaker and microphone on the outer side, depending on which microphone is used.

Make Verizon union workers happy: talk more!

Verizon's Flash Mob

Verizon's Flash Mob

Design idea: Happy Verizon Wireless customer enjoys great cell phone service. His opinion is backed up with opinions of lots of happy others.

How it appears:
Ver 1: Verizon Wireless union workers standing as a solid wall: “You should talk more to make us happy. We will come after you If you do not make us happy”.
Ver.2: This service is for hard top hat guys, McDonalds store managers and all these kinda blue collars.

Most of you probably saw this dumb TV commercial from Verizon: whole bunch of folks followed by dedicated one are loitering around looking for someone who is in trouble with cell phone: no coverage, low battery, etc. The crowd approaches the victim, pulls’em over and then starts to blame with ironical criticism for choosing the wrong service plan.

Hey, WTF? Just picture this in reality: you are talking to somebody over the phone and suddenly you figure out that this flash mob rushes right to you. First thoughts: scream and run. And call 911.

Conclusion: Idea sucks big time.

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